Girl Talk

By Melaina Bergin

2010-05-24T22:06:00.001-07:00

What do I want?
Well I certainly didn't want that.
Not that you asked
before
during
or after.

What I needed was for you to care
about how I felt,
beyond how I felt
pressed underneath your fingertips.

How do I want it?
My way or the high way.
But since you clearly don't comprehend
my way,
the highway
would be down the street,
a few blocks down,
and to the right.

Who do I want?
Well I couldn't possibly want someone
that treats women like
an object
toy
or nuisance.

So when you laugh at my rights
without recognizing women died for them,
When you treat me like respect is merely a suggestion,
and when you look into my eyes
but never bother to look into my soul,
there isn't a doubt in my mind
that I don't want,
won't have,
and can't take
an animal like you.

V-Day Interview with Sita Goetschius!

2010-04-22T18:51:00.000-07:00

What does V-day stand for?

V-Day is an organization started by Eve Ensler, author of "The Vagina Monologues", and strives to stop violence against women. They do this through having sets of monologues that have either been written or edited by Eve Ensler available for anyone to organize an event around for free. The only thing that they ask for in exchange for copyrights are to follow a set of rules, including donating at least 10% of the profits to their "spotlight" cause and the rest to non- profits that benefit women.

Have any problems with admin?
The only problem we encountered was trying to find a faculty member to open up the NMU for us and supervise the event. By time we found somebody, someone else took the original date and we had to change the performance day. Otherwise, the Casa Grande administration was very supportive of the event.

What did this production bring attention to and why?
This production brings attention to violence, stereotypes, and double standards that women face. My group members and I feel that these are very pressing and important issues that should be addressed.

What was your motivation to do an event of this magnitude?
The motivation to do this large of an event came from a variety of things, including Emily and mine's passion for theatre, Eve Ensler's writing, V-Day Petaluma productions, and understanding the magnitude of the violence that occurs against women. Incidents like the ones in Lynch Creek and in Richmond also bring more awareness and attention to this issue.

How did you get other students involved?

The group thought of people who we thought would be or are interested in performing and women's rights, and from there contacted them about doing the event. It was really people who we could think of who were interested.

What did the event consist of?

The event consisted of monologues and poetry from "A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant, and A Prayer" (MMRP) and public domain sources. After about an hour of performances we had six different groups tabling with information that the audience was free to explore. The groups tabling were V-Day Petaluma, GirlTalk, The Zero Campaign, BRAVE People, and IMPACT!. Heather Hatch, Sonja Frayne, and Camille Copland also sold baked goods and split the profits between our beneficiaries and their RRR Spring Project.

Where did you guys get the idea?

As part of the assignment, we had to do something that combated or raised awareness about intolerance. All four of us felt strongly about the intolerance around the world against women and wanted to do a project that dealt with that. From there, we had a bunch of different ideas and finally decided to put on a V-Day event because we felt that it would be very effective.

How long have you been planning it?

We started working on this in March.

Was it a success and why?

I think that overall it was a success. We raised about $300 for United Against Sexual Assault of Sonoma County (UASA), BRAVE People, and the women and girls of the Democratic Republic of the Congo. After the show, I had many different audience members telling me how much they really enjoyed the performances, including members of the V-Day Petaluma cast. We are the first high school V-Day Campaign in the North Bay, and I think we started something that will hopefully continue.

What parts of the community were involved?

Five of our performers were either adults or students from different high schools. Trisha Almond, the organizer for V-Day Petaluma, helped us immensely with planning this project, and almost all of the organizations tabling the event were community- based organizations.

International Women's Day! Webinar!

2010-03-08T22:20:00.001-08:00

Today I was one of the four Casa students to attend the Webinar about Maternal Mortality and whatnot, so I thought I’d share my take on it for the rest of the people who might have been interested.

The powerpoint brought up some really interesting statistics, and the women were stressing that these were only approximations, and that in reality numbers of deaths were probably much higher.

But what was truly mind-boggling to me was that, we, as America, pledged to donate a certain amount of money each year to help women worldwide with education, contraceptives, medical care, etc; but we have barely paid any of what we promised we would. Of course, most of the payment was supposed to have happened during Bush’s Administration. There was no economic crisis until 2008, so we had no real monetary excuse. The Bush Administration’s excuse? That all the money was funding abortions, a practice which is typically disliked by conservatives. But the women clarified that the money would help lower the abortion rate in the first place, and they said that every investigation into this claim showed that little, if any money, was for abortions.

Obviously in our financial crisis at the moment, we don’t exactly have excess money to make up for the seven years of funding we failed to produce. However, Obama is trying to steadily increase the amount of money to organizations like these. But that money isn’t going to magically appear, and there are always other causes people will see as more important. And health care in our own country isn’t so fabulous that we can focus on international health issues (not that I don’t think they are EXTREMELY important.)

African American women are 4 times more likely due to complications in childbirth. 4 times. Some parts of cities in the United States are nearing 3rd world country status. And yet health care debates are about whether or not women have the right to abortion. How about we all, Americans, Nigerians, Indians, Nicaraguans, Bangladeshi, we all just have the right to survive a pregnancy, accidental or not?

Tiger Woods

2010-02-24T21:00:00.000-08:00

I would like to address, briefly, the Tiger Woods scandal.

His business is his business; any reasoning he has for his actions are his own and not to open for anyone else to judge. Most people don't care.

However, the conversations in classrooms and over social networking sites paint a different picture: Woods is a 'pimp' and a 'stud' for having multiple sexual partners who were not his wife. Again, this is a minor point. People do what they want to do, usually without regard to the people it will affect. In this case, Woods obviously had no respect for his wife or their relationship, much less his image.

The important thing to note, here, is that Woods is being idolized for his actions by being seen as a player, a womanizer, a pimp, or a stud. Not only is this boosting his fame and therefore power, but his income as well. Young men see men in a position of power, adored for his fame and rich to boot, and his behavior is justified, thus making the action excusable for anyone. For young girls, it reinforces the idea of a male dominated society in which, if a man cheats on his wife, he becomes more famous; whereas if a women in the media's eye cheats on her husband, she is scorned as a slut and destroyer of the nuclear family. A man in this position profits from the publicity, whereas a woman's career could end.

I cannot find the Words-Cordelia Kritz

2010-01-30T23:35:00.000-08:00

The beating, the crying, the silence

I cry from that room

That box of things

Mascara

Skirts

And cleavage

You expect me to fit into

Squeeze into

Cut off my arms and legs

And my short circuit

Annoying inconsequential non-human

Brain

I don’t need it

My arms and legs

I don’t need them

The only thing I would use

My arms for is to fight

Back

As you suppress

Drug and caress me

Tie down

And undress me

My brain I don’t need

I don’t need to think

While you shove me into

The murky waters

I lay unconscious

While I sink

And fall into a beautiful

Stunning

Sexy

Bloody

Beaten

Cut down and

Screechin’

Bleedin’

And beatin’

Body

Or carnage

A ravaged

Vagina, no wait..

Sorry I mean, Opening

You can insert

Your power

Into

Women

Wo-men

Just a portion of

Man

But without

The masculinity

Blissfully ignorant self inserted

Pride

Without the man we

Are nothing

Without a penis

We are nothing

So ravage me

Undress me and

Spitefully caress me

Spit on my temple

And I will stand here

Bloody and beaten

And I still cannot find the words

Cordelia Kritz

2010-01-29T00:00:00.001-08:00

Why I am a Bitch

Bitch: Its original use as a vulgarism, documented to the fourteenth century, suggested high sexual desire in a woman, comparable to a bitch in heat. The range of meanings has expanded in modern usage. In a feminist context, it can indicate a strong or assertive woman, one who might make men feel threatened. When applied to a man, "bitch" is a derogatory term for a subordinate.

What is a bitch? Some would jokingly define the word as a female dog, if so when I am a bitch I am reduced to the intelligence and animalistic behaviors of a dog. I am a dog. A flee biting, ear scratching, fire hydrant pissing, disease infested dog. I am the lame dog with a lazy eye that limps to your doorstep. I am vulnerable, but you do not stop to take one look at me before I am sent to the pound to be “taken care of”. You see me as in need of help, but are too scared to come near me for fear that when you reach to pet me, I will bite back. So I ask again, what is a bitch? And you say, that it is a girl or woman that challenges the stereotype; who bites your fingers when you try to pet her face, who pisses on fire hydrants and scratches her flee infested fur, who eats scraps off the ground instead of on a silver plate, who wears no clothes not to offend but to be free from the weight of womanhood. I am a bitch; a bitch with free will and no limitations, a bitch who speaks her mind. So what are you?

You will not know what it means to be called a bitch until you imagine yourself in that girl’s shoes. You will not know what it feels like to be bitch until you have walked by girls whispering words of hatred in disguise. Yelling and screaming at a boy, this girl feels helpless and likes she is going against everything she’s been told. The boy says that she is over-reacting and that she should just calm down. The girl doesn’t calm down because she feels like yelling is all she can do right now. Yelling is all she can muster up when she opens her mouth to speak. The next day she has to be calm and nice as if she is approaching a small animal, she has to be sensitive. Because if she is not. If she goes against every social norm she’s ever been taught she will become what is most feared by every girl. She will become that bitch. And who would want to date a girl that is a bitch? If the boy continues to date this girl he is “whipped” and then he might as well be a girl himself. If he continues to be the “girl” he is weak and incapable of being “a man”. So the girl walks into the room, breath hitting her chest in hot spurts, sleeves rolled up from anger. She sits down, takes a deep inhale, and smiles at the boy breathless and unable to yell any longer.

“You are a son-of-a-bitch.” If you are a guy you probably are insulted right now. You’re thinking wow! I cannot believe she just said that. If that were the male equivalent insult to “bitch”, then it is important to realize that it really isn’t an insult to the male at all. If you are a son of a bitch then it is simply that your mother, “the bitch”, is to blame for anything you have done wrong. If you are acting inappropriately then, your mom must have brought you up poorly because why else would you be to blame? Nothing a man does can ever be blamed, because if he yells or screams he is just indicting his power. He is just being a guy. This is not an attack on males but merely what society has dictated to be “the norm”.

Misogyny is hatred towards women. Therefore, the word bitch is misogynistic and a word that although does not cross your mind when you speak it, defines intolerance. Animals in labor were, during the 1400’s, labeled with the term “bitch in heat”. So think about that. Think about what that means. That means that women are easily compared to an animal in labor. A pig veiled in soil rolling on the ground; an animal in extreme discomfort, crying and screaming from the pain. This is a bitch in heat; a bitch that is now a human being, rather a woman who promotes promiscuity or rather a woman who yells or shows ANGER. This woman you’ve all seen and you have all called a bitch. I know this because I have too. It is ok in everyday life. It is a word that is used so commonly that no one even frets when it is spoken, much like the word “rape” which is now used as a verb to describe doing well on a test (for example: “Man, I just raped my test!”). Since when did words that used to depict ideas of horror and censure become casual jokes that are thrown around on a daily basis? Why is it that we can use the word bitch against our peers and friends as a joke, when behind it there is so much more anguish than we dare to conceal? The word is not a joke and behind it all no one is really laughing.

My body...

2010-01-26T21:13:00.000-08:00

My body fights. Itself, mostly. Sometimes other people. Sometimes against what it wants or what it needs. My body is a stronger fighter; it is only limited by my mental state. My body and my brain are one, coexisting to create a capable woman who can. She can do what she wants. She can elevate herself. She can nourish her mind, body, and soul. My body fights for what my mind believes, against the rainstorm of hate and violence and abuse of power. My body fights at all times, without fail or pause.

The Takeover Casa Style

2010-01-17T22:47:00.000-08:00

While working on the Dressing Room Takeover, to boost other girls' self- esteem, I can't help but think of my own less-than-ideal self-esteem and image. It is somewhat ironic and contradicting that I fully believe in beauty inside and out, and having confidence in oneself, when I lack seeing these things in myself. Sure, I don't look in the mirror and scream about how hideous I think I am, but I am still constantly criticizing myself, and looking at all of my flaws.

I guess it comes from being a perfectionist and wanting to be the best I can in everything I do. I've always grown up with the philosophy that I can always do better. While it pushes me to try my hardest and achieve my goals, it is as easily detrimental to my personal image and worth. "You can always do better": I could be prettier; I could be smarter; I could be less guarded about my insecurities; I could be less critical; I could be better at one thing or another. In my head, I am constantly thinking about the negative qualities I possess; among them being my enormous hesitance to let others see my negative traits. I am insecure about my insecurities.

I am fighting between the two me's: The strong, happy go- lucky, confident me that I embrace, and most people see; and the scared, insecure, lonely me, who is a combination of all the parts of me that I don't like, and I had denied its very existence for a long time. I am fighting to find a balance between these two girls: one that is strong and confident, and accepts, no, embraces her flaws.

With this in mind, I am more encouraged to help other girls help their self-image and worth, only because I see my own negative self- image, and don't like it one bit. I don't want others to be where I am now, and sincerely want change as a whole for the better.

Who knows? Maybe a little will rub off onto me.

-Anonymous

Sita Goetschius' Spoken Word

2009-11-17T22:25:00.000-08:00

I tried.
I tried to conform to the constraining standards that are constantly forced before me

I tried to compromise
My individuality
To emulate the images encircling me

But I couldn't.
As hard as I tried,
I don't have it in me
To surrender myself to something surreal.

If you will excuse me,
But I like being my own person too much to be anything else.
I'm fine right here thank you,
The grass is plenty green on this side.

I tried to change
But once I started to see,
I backed out.
It didn't appeal

"Black your eyes everyday,
To look alive"
But all I saw was a zombie.

"Put this, and that
Into your hair to make it shiny, soft and sheen"
But all I felt was hard, sticky shit.

"Be this size, squeeze into these minuscule jeans
Fit for only those fabricated by fashion monsters"
But I all did was walk a little funny with my insides interpolated into me.

"Here, try this bra,
You'll look two times sexier"
But all I felt was unsexy plastic shoved in every which way.

I refuse, reject, repudiate these ridiculous requirements.

Confidence is my make up and hair.
Brains are my size
Individuality is what I do.

I tried to conform,
But my conscious took over.

Gaucho Gazette Interview

2009-11-13T14:15:00.000-08:00

The following is a complete interview with Ginamarie about the Zero Campaign and the student rally held at Casa. Parts of the interview appeared in the Gaucho Gazette. Nina Udomsak conducted the interview via email.

What is your mission statement for Girl Talk? In other words, what do you hope to accomplish with this club?

Girl Talk’s goal is to create a space for feminism at Casa. We strive to create a space where men and women can discuss issues in a way that promotes equality and education on those issues. This allows for a healthier, happier, more solid student body.

What is your mission statement for T0C? In other words, what

do you hope to accomplish with this campaign?

The Zero Campaign got its name because those of us who work with The Zero Campaign have zero tolerance for sexual assault, abuse, and harassment. We work to bring the number of victims as close to zero as possible by breaking down social barriers and stigmas regarding rape, domestic abuse, and sexual assault. These problems are all very prominent in our community and our surrounding communities; however, they are not talked about or discussed publicly. Those of us working on The Zero Campaign feel that the silence around these issues needs to be broken and we would like to do this by being a means of support for students. We are aware that this is a sensitive issue and hope to address it in a manner that is appropriate.

What gave you the idea to start the Zero Campaign? Why is it

important to you and everyone at school (both genders, all ages)?

The Zero Campaign came out of a Girl Talk meeting a couple of weeks ago. I heard about the gang rape in Richmond as I was on my way to the meeting and it became the focus of that meeting. We decided then to go into classrooms and have a rally to show solidarity with the victim and her family. However, we felt that in order to participate in multiple actions and to take it past the rape in Richmond, that we should call it something else. Raelyn Caldwell thought of the name and it fit really well so we went with it.

The Zero Campaign is important and relevant to all of us. When Raelyn and I went into classrooms, we came across a sophomore class and went and gave the same speech we’d given other classes. Their teacher asked how many kids knew someone who had been raped, and three fourths of the students raised their hands. That was an intense moment of realization for Raelyn and me. That class was mainly 14-15 year old students, and twenty knew someone who’d been raped? That alone blows most statistics out of the water. So even if you’re a freshman or a senior, a girl or a boy, a majority of us have dealt with this issue before, whether it was a direct experience or the experience of someone we know.

What hopes did you have for the rally? What did you think of its

outcome?

Our main hope for the rally was to get the word out about what happened, to introduce The Zero Campaign, and to show solidarity with the Richmond High student who is dealing with something very painful. It reinforces the idea that we are supporting each other any way we can. I hoped students would react appropriately to it, and the majority of them did. For a first action, I felt like it was a success. More opportunities for the campaign and the club came from it, so it won’t be the last thing students will see from us.

How do you think you affected students with the rally, and with the

classroom visits? Are there any particular student reactions you'd

like to share?

I know that the rally encouraged students who don’t normally speak to speak to a scary audience--their peers. Cordelia Kritz and Ryan Markey both performed poems they had written themselves. I think that that kind of raw material drew some other students in and made them wonder what we were all about. I saw a lot of interest at the rally and a lot of emotion from students when we went into classrooms. To my surprise, we were generally by students. I know that some other club members had students who were in tears about what happened. It hit everyone who heard about it pretty hard, whether they showed it with their emotions or with a really heavy silence. You could just tell that for at least a moment, it weighed heavily on people’s minds.

What else are you doing for the Zero Campaign? What can other

students do to help?

We are currently focusing on fundraising for Girl Talk and for the girl from Richmond. We are selling the t-shirt that the club members were wearing at the rally and working with a few teachers on further actions involving women’s issues as well as with groups like CODEPINK and UASA [United Against Sexual Assault] in regards to The Zero Campaign. We hope to continue action with The Zero Campaign as much as possible. If students want a t-shirt they can contact Raelyn Caldwell, Jordan Schlau, or myself. We also accept donations for both the student from Richmond High and for Girl Talk.

What are your thoughts about the Richmond High gang rape?

To be honest, I’d have to go really in depth to tell you that. I can say that when I heard about it I was really emotional; I’d never heard about something so brutal happening in the Bay Area. After hearing about it, I became more familiar with what happened and found that things like this actually happen with an alarming frequency; they just don’t stay in mainstream news. Things like rape are given space in the news but disappear far too quickly. This inhibits discussion about sexual assault because people figure that “it just doesn’t happen here”. It does. Men rape women no matter where they live, how old they are, what color they are, what their social status is, or what they do in their free time.

What other issues do you plan to focus on in Girl Talk?

We focus a lot on media imagery and the effect it has on our peers, both male and female. We hope to have more guest speakers from feminist organizations like CODEPINK and about-face. We are also planning to host a workshop from about-face on negative media influence and feminism in general. Most meetings include some type of planning for these and/or a discussion.

Anything else you want me to include in the article?

Girl Talk meets Wednesdays at lunch in M-2. Everyone is welcome, male or female. If you’re male and want to come to a meeting, don’t be intimidated; you won’t be the only male there. Girl Talk has a Facebook page that you can find and join as well as a blog that members are encouraged to post to. It can be found at casagirltalk.blogspot.com; students are welcome to write a piece, create a video, or create any other media that relates to feminism and it can be added to the blog with credit or anonymously. To do this, simply post your work on the Facebook page, give it to me, or leave it in M-2 with a note asking that it be put on the blog.

The Zero Campaign

2009-11-10T22:28:00.000-08:00

Girl Talk, in response to a brutal gang rape at Richmond High, has created the Zero Campaign.

Zero tolerance for sexual assault and zero victims of rape and assault. We have gone into classrooms to talk about the rape in Richmond, to educate, and to rally students in support of the victim and her family. We have held a student rally that included student speakers, poets, and outreach in the form of statistics regarding sexual assault and rape. We have raised money for the victim and her family. The rally has inspired a teacher at Casa Grande High to shift the focus of a previously planned teach in from poverty to women's issues. We are also in contact with United Against Sexual Assault and will be working with them when possible.

Spoken word

2009-10-26T13:35:00.000-07:00

Silicone bullets burst onto busts of a blossoming

generation

On their knees

Screaming, please, please, PLEASE

squeeze into these jeans.

Just one size smaller,

just one inch taller

Until we disappear,

and it's never clear

How to stop and say

I won't be this way.

New Meaning

2009-10-22T14:41:00.000-07:00

“As a feminist, I disgust myself. How can I call myself a feminist while being an obvious product of a patriarchial, dominantly white society hell bent on breaking down women by keeping them weak, uneducated about our own bodies, and held to impossible standards of beauty? How can I mix these two elements of my life-this desire to be within the image that breaks down my gender as a whole and my desire to be a strong, independent, intelligent woman who breaks down those images? The false standards of beauty, constantly perpetuated by our media and our peers, simultaneously drives and disgusts me.”

-Livejournal entry, 12/7/08

It has been nearly a year since this was written in my online journal; a year of change, a year of growth, [literally and figuratively!] and a year of challenges. I wrote this at the tail end of my own, undiagnosed eating disorder. I suffered for three years, in a perpetual cycle of unhealthy eating and exercise habits, disgust at those habits and a disgust for myself as a person who was so conflicted. To everyone I knew, I was a confident, strong individual who didn’t give a fuck about what anyone else thought. On my own, however, I was internalizing my idea of perfection and my growing anxiety by starving myself. I struggled constantly, trying to balance these two Ginamaries: one who was and is a strong, confident woman; and one, who is equally critical and points that criticism most harshly in her own direction. For now, I have gotten closer to that balance. I use that criticism to drive myself to do things that promote confidence and healthy living. I use my knowledge and experience to support a movement that I am quickly becoming deeply involved in. I give myself more to participate in, more to be passionate about, and more to love.

Looking back on that time, I am amazed at how many girls I knew and talked to on a daily basis who were taking part in unhealthy, even fatal behaviors; while there is an obvious disrespect of our bodies in treating them this way, I was not the only one torn between my political beliefs and my attachment to an eating disorder. How is an unattainable image of beauty, perfection, and control so deeply engrained in adolescent girls? Even if we denounce all stereotypical media that bombards us with photoshopped images, we are still trying to grow in a world where most girls feel a need--like eating, sleeping, or breathing--to look a certain way. What's worse is that, by being apathetic, we are feeding it. We are allowing images to break us down and we don't care. Most girls even buy these images in the form of magazines, posters, or album art. We as a society are jaded to what is hurting us the most; it is like a silent beast, moving amongst us without notice. No one has shouted 'What is that, and what is it doing here?' so girls are falling prey every day.